Movie Review: 'Dhoom 3'

Bande hain hum uske, hum pe kiska zor,

chahe kitna hype ho, na jaaye Dhoom ki our.

Three parallels can be drawn that would be reflective of your emotions while watching the movie. First, The Great Indian Circus which is at the centre of the film, should be the title of the movie which conveys the true feeling for the film. Second, you would find yourself unblinkingly staring at Kamali being far keener than Aamir was. And third, during some of the scenes you would feel like subjecting yourself to the last act of Jackie Shroff.

Among many some of the bigger, specific problems I have with this movie are - Katrina switches between Kamali the stunner and Kamali the philosopher. You could find Katrina of ZNMD popping in between and giving the gyaan of life saying "I am not a kaash girl", implying the same philosophic line when she says just after the passionate osculation with Hrithik "Mujhe Afsos karna nahi aata". Jay (Abhishek Bachchan) , often seen unnecessarily adjusting his glasses perched on his nose has no charisma of a shrewd cop and looks like he had to accept the role because he was in the earlier versions of the franchise. Saahir (Aamir) spares his life twice but in the end he turns back with the fake passion, desperately showing how smartass he could get!  The scene in which Ali (over-enthusiastic Uday) convinces the defeated Jay to stay back and fight for his honour indicates the same spirit which Aditya Chopra must have asked Abhishek to keep for the movie. To add insult to injury, Jay crosses the limits of disgust when he flaunts these dialogues, "Aisi chandani mein chor ko pehli baar pakda hai" and to convey his ideology that nights belong to thieves and mornings to police, he calls up his assistant and demands, "I need a chopper and a SWAT team at sunrise". Had I not had the thin hope of seeing Katrina again I would have left the hall right then.

Only Katrina is a treat, rest everything is bleak. Calling Katrina hot would be a big understatement. Her stunning bod relentlessly exudes a lot of steam especially the way she dances and leaves all her contemporaries steaming out of jealousy. Aamir's certain facial expressions in casual outfits give you the glimpse of Rancho of 3 Idiots whereas certain looks seem to be imported from Ghajani before getting his head shaven. Yes there are some whooshing bike chasing scenes but not at not at all jaw-dropping. The spark of the movie should be the perspicacity of the villain and how he operates, how he escapes, and how he flim-flams the entire police force. But here all we see is a clean-shaven, revenge-hungry, middle-aged thief running down the building facade with the shower of currency notes in the backdrop that leaves you assuming that Saahir must have done something outstanding. It's Uday who sticks to his guns, knows his role, and repeats it showing his irresistible doggish nature of drooling over hot chicks.

It's all in all Aamir show with him consuming over two-third of the screen time. The expectations of a kick-ass baddie got better of him and he clearly looked misfit for the role despite certain spikes of acting that he anyway manages to pull off with great ease. Only two things are perfect in the movie – Aamir’s abs and Katrina’s curves. Being a bit liberal I would say this feebly scripted movie is not so disgusting that it can’t be watched at all. 

But you can’t avoid the fact that Dhoom 3 brings with it doom for free.

(Happy) Independence Day!

Today is the 66^th birthday of independent Mother India. My heartfelt tribute goes to the then freedom fighters and firm salute goes to the jawans at the borders.

What is the day like?

Log on to Facebook and you would see a great deal of patriotism running all over. It is good to see that there are some days when you feel the sense of Indianness, however questionable it may be. But I find it most surprising when such flood of patriotism is carried by some of the NRIs who don’t even prefer to drink regular Indian water and carry mineral water bottles like mini oxygen cylinders they can’t live without even for their short stints in India.

Now, turn on the TV. Movies like Gandhi, Border, Gadar and versions of Vande Mataram from Lata’s to Rahman’s are showcased as a part of the national day tradition. Whenever I happen to see the glance of any of them, they make me feel that the time hasn’t passed since I finished my higher secondary education. Today I encountered the same thing. I happened to see the scene in the movie Gandhi - when Gandhiji reached Dandi and picked a pinch of salt saying it is the right of every Indian to claim on the salt belonging to the Indian Ocean. I proudly agreed with Gandhiji and switched to a news channel that took me from salt to onions. Even on Independence Day, onions, despite being in their uncut form, have gathered the courage to bring tears in the eyes of the Indian people and outnumbered independent-looking India’s age with their prices. Inspired by onions, even rupee is on its way to exceed mom India’s age. There is nothing wrong in remembering good times but there is certainly wrong in only remembering good times and drowning yourself in to the fictional world. Disappointing thing is that people are still happy rejoicing either when India wins a cricket match or when Sunny Deol screams with passion for India to provide cushion to their nationalism.

Ok, let's ride on to the wave of debates. I am sure that various news anchors must be preparing for their night debates on the lines of Mighty Modi versus Meek Manmohan – who struck the chord with the nation in his Independence day speech? A question as dumb and as who struck the chord between the one who fumbles in a prepared, and rehearsed speech and the one who fearlessly changes the rules of Indian politics almost every alternate day. I am not biased towards Modi but given the options he certainly looks better for now.

Reality check -

I wish a very happy Independence Day to all the Indians who believe in India’s freedom. I believe that freedom is a state of mind and has to be celebrated on a daily basis, not as an achievement but as a token of differentiation between your human-self and trapped, dumb animals. I first demand the freedom of speech and expression in this Independent state of India from the authorities who never disagree but always ready to tweak the section 66(A) of IT Act and lock up anyone they want to who might have expressed their opinions against their vested interests.

The feeling of being independent will pass in no time and we will be back to reality; in the shoddy world of corruption, scams, rapes, struggling economy, nettlesome neighbours, and falling morale along with falling rupee. And, the dolt politicians will continue to flex their muscles and flaunt their powers right after the flag-hoisting itself and we will continue to remain in a fool’s paradise if we don't decide to take on the mess.

Look, I am a realist and try hard to become an optimist whenever I can see or create hope. You can change the reality only when you accept it. I feel there is still a hope to bring about the freedom in a real sense. Some of the very basic things that need to be done are – Do your duty honestly; earn more money and help the needy when you can; do extend your service to the society when your personal and family needs are sufficiently over; stop the wrongdoing else get it stopped by whoever can; blow the whistle anonymously if you feel so, but do blow it, it will blow up the dirt; and do vote. I have been doing all in my personal capacity and when I see other educated, cribbing people not doing even such basic things they can, it hurts and beyond a point, annoys.

See, I am not being a preacher here but if you think so, so be it. It is pouring in Bangalore and my ginger tea has become cold by now. It’s just that when I calmed the fluttering curtains and slid the window open to smell the rainy breeze, I saw a small kid running with a tri-colour in his hand. During my studies I learnt that the Orange in the tri-colour indicates sacrifice, the White indicates peace, and the Green, prosperity. But it made my heart skip a beat when I made a mental analogy in today’s situation. The government is sacrificing the lives of our armed forces in order to gain an impossible peace with our neighbour and continues to prosper itself regardless of nation's progress! And it's this thought that made me express my views.

It will not make any difference if you can't stand up during the national anthem; but it will certainly make a difference if you can't stand up for the nation.

Movie Review: 'Chennai Express'

Rohit Shetty is back with his comic lens. This time around it is SRK’s turn to bring the joker cap on; he does and yes, he does justice too with his buffoonery to the level he best can. The movie starts with Rahul (SRK), a decent, middle-aged, single and craving-to-mingle Mumbaikar planning a trip to Goa when his destiny has already decided a bumpy South India trip for him. He brings Meena (Deepika) on board and then the movie along with the train gets hijacked by the outlaws of Chennai. It makes me feel sorry even to remember the scenes. Request you to see the trailer as it exactly tells you what the movie has to offer and if that is all to be offered then I leave it to your imagination what then over two hours are stuffed with.

Unlike her Cocktail character, Deepika is seen wrapped up throughout the movie, mainly in saris, and looks very elegant. She very successfully puts on a character of a confident, caring, religious, and freedom-loving Tamilian girl who struggles against her father’s wish to marry her off to a local, burly goon. But SRK is a hero who when spreads out his arms, charms girls and when swings his arms, whacks villains even though he is barely half the size of his mammoth opponents. Even a kindergartner of current generation will tell that SRK will be able to apply ‘Ek chutki sindoor’ (this time) and get hitched with the dimpled beauty.  It’s a poor and predictable story with trivial twists and no brain usage. In fact, you will add to the comedy if you dare to turn your brains on. As it is a Rohit Shetty work, there is no news that you will have cars flying, short non-vulgar comic lines, and scenes-capturing through top views. His attempt of infusing humour in communication through bollywood songs is well received. Moreover, Rohit seems to have done a good homework in livening up the rawness of the southern baddies. However, overdose of Tamil can really be off-putting for the outlanders. Couple of references of his past movies help SRK in adding to the fun he is supposed to deliver. Putting aside my personal liking for Deepika, the only pertinent adjective comes to my mind is ‘fantabulous’ for her performance. You will want to hear more bits of South-Indian Hindi from this charming chick. The movie scores well in the music department as almost all songs are hummable and form a grip with the moving story.

On the whole, it’s a good commercial attempt to capitalize on the festival and cash in on it. The movie mostly is a drag. I would solely blame the feeble script. You might feel sympathetic to SRK for going overboard in convincing that he can be funny. Deepika will manage to get you some smiles and the songs will give you some breaks from the nonsense you are trapped in. Don’t overestimate the power of the cast. Ready, Steady, Po far away from the theatres.

Movie Review: 'Bhaag Milkha Bhaag'

The movie opens with the cheers from the audience in the stadium converging with the hoots within the cinema hall when the camera admiringly revolves around Milkha Singh’s imposing posture. The story is then put on a snail-paced, detail-rich biographical path and goes back and forth more than necessary times, interrupting the normal pace of watching just exactly when the environment is set. The movie spans from Milkha as a kid till Milkha ‘became India’. You are introduced deeply with the determined personality of Milkha Singh, the living legend, through the finest performance by Farhan Akhtar. The protagonist shows you what he went through, how he took it, what he had to let go, what kept him going, how he hung on, and what he eventually became. Now let me come to some specifics. There’s not even an iota of suspense in the story. You would see creativity in expressing a real, heart-felt love; be it with your sister, friend, lover, or nation. You are sure to learn some cost-effective yet workable and timelessly charming ways of impressing your girl. The story essentially covers how a pitiable victim of partition became the proud, plugging link between the two nations.

The director, Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra is a master of presenting reality without razzmatazz. He has shown his forte in showing past and present parallels beautifully. You would also see directing cameras worship the elegance hidden in slowness and close-ups when some of the reels move on screen. It would have been better had couple of songs were eroded that were real patches that didn’t do anything material to the script but to add to the movie-duration. Bhaag Milkha Bhaag is watchable as a token of admiration for the evidently wholehearted dedication put in by Farhan Akhtar and most especially as a mark of respect to the legend Flying Sikh himself.

Movie Review: 'Jolly LLB'

I don’t know if this movie joins the league of the successful movies wherein the second half of the title describe the first half, covered by the protagonist, like Chachi 420, Munnabhai MBBS, and Vicky Donor - the ones my brain could promptly produce. But for now, let me put my analytical brain aside and get down to what movie has to offer.

There is a hit-and-run car accident by a rich drunken dude whose family puts a fat sum of money before highly reputed, very seasoned, and a bigheaded lawyer named Rajpal (Boman Irani) to save him. A gutsy guy from Meerut, Jagdish Tyagi (Arshad Warsi), who is known as Jolly, decides to re-open the buried case to seek some publicity that this much-hyped case has created.  His character validates his nickname. When he tries to take on Rajpal, the titan makes him aware of his miniature level. After getting taunted by his fiancée, Sandhya (Amrita Rao) that he has turned into a broker from a lawyer, getting slapped by the person he respects, and being denied for peeing on a footpath, Jolly turns into an empathetic soul. He changes from fame-minded, money-oriented, budding lawyer who falters in English to the level of not knowing how to even spell ‘Affidavit’ to a lawyer who dares to fight for bringing justice to the weak. Arshad pulls off Jolly’s character with a visible conviction. Boman is as usual great in his arrogant-avatar. Amrita Rao is a forgettable filler. But the hero, for me is Saurabh Shukla, the judge who is so freaking funny and so ruthlessly real that you can’t but laugh your head off, especially for his dialogue delivery and immaculate comic timing.

The movie seems to know its limitations and so, the best thing about the movie is its timing, i.e. less than two hours. Thank God that there are no patches of unnecessary action, adventure, emotional drag, preaching, and most importantly, sex. But yes, there are two goddamned songs that stick out as sore, dirty thumbs. The director Subhash Kapoor has very nicely unveiled the unseen layers of Indian court rooms. Jolly LLB has nothing to offer except some really amazing laughs. The angle of the comedy is new and the dialogues look very fresh. It’s neither a movie that you mustn’t miss nor it’s a movie that makes you feel used. It’s a typical Bollywood movie that ensures you a punishment if you dare to watch it with your brains turned on. Decide for yourself while I give it a deserving 3 on 5.

Movie Review: 'Kai Po Che!'

Bollywood-loving audience has always welcomed male friendship trio; for instance - Dil Chahta Hai, 3-idiots, ZNMD, etc. and this time around, when B-town has flung one more of its kind to join this club, I clearly see Kai Po Che! striking friendly chords among the youth.

The story begins with the ending of the twentieth century in Ahmedabad, showing three close friends with varied characteristics, struggling to make livelihood. Govind (Raj Kumar Yadav) is a serious, career-conscious, penny-measuring baniya with lots of plans running in his head of how to set up a sports shop that can provide cricket coaching along with selling sports goods. Omi (Amit Sadh) manages to get finances from his maternal uncle, a political brain who very desperately wants this son of a respected Hindu priest to join his pack and gain him political mileage. Ishaan (Sushant Singh Rajput), a cricket fanatic is a district-level cricket player, has been a victim of dirty politics of selectors and turned into a slaphappy short fuse. He comes across a gifted batsman in the form of a little Muslim kid, Ali and determines to make him a national player what he couldn't be. While all the friends enjoy their baby-steps towards their dream of a successful venture, Omi slowly gets called in the politics. On one hand when Ishaan, an ideal mentor, teaches the batting strokes to Ali, on the other, his equally strong-willed sister teaches love lessons to her Maths teacher, Govind. The new century kicks in with two of the major blows that Gujarat has ever had - severe earthquake and flaming communal riots following it in the subsequent year. The former cracks their dream and the latter, relations. They are all compelled to put their priorities in order and then one comes up against the other. They get locked into the unsolvable maze of rigid emotions. All of them try to get free of those complex threads of inexplicable relations and yes, they are able to do so.  Their enviable friendship eventually wins over their mutual differences, but only after having paid an unbearable price!

Under the direction of Abhishek Kapoor, actors are bound to take off their shirts and jump off the highest point to plunge into the huge water body; like we have seen in Rock On, here too the boys repeat the same stunts in Diu. The scenes that kept lingering in my head were the ones when Ishaan and Omi wash away their grudges after running up the streets, hugging, dancing and cheering when India wins a cricket match; and when Ishaan and his sister fight and reconcile in their own sweet ways. All the actors do full justice to their given roles and infuse believable characters they are given to perform. Hats off to the team for pulling off the hearty story in the heart of the hard realities. Go, watch the movie. Its good story, responsible acting and a lovely song Manja by Amit Trivedi, all more than make up for an easily ignorable slowness the movie carries in bits and pieces and a couple of Gujarati dialogues without sub-titles that might cark Non-Gujaratis.